please come back. Posted at 9:06:00 PM 0 comments (+) Thunder's missing. I just woke up an hour ago, and my family panicked. They couldn't find them. So they were practically yelling his name across the street, talking to neighbors and driving around the neighborhood. I started crying because - that's my dog. I wished for him. I always cared for him. He made me smile and all of that. But I never thought that when I would fall asleep, he'd be gone. Everyone's criticizing me now for crying. My dad especially being a fucking asshole. "You never cared for him anyway." What the fuck did you ever do for him? I'm the one who had to feed him every day and get my clothes dirty from his paws. Plus, you're practically the reason that he is fucking gone for not fixing the fucking fence. That could've been done in ten minutes. Ten little fucking minutes of your life you could've fixed that damn fence and he'd still be here. I wish that there were something I could've done, and that's why I'm crying. I don't think I could deal with the fact that Thunder's gone. I always imagined growing up and him still being there. If I could, I'd round up airplanes, police cars and a big ass search unit. But all I could do is cry and pray he'll come back soon.

HE GOT FOUND. HE CAME TO THE FRONT DOOR YOU ASSHOLE.

Insecure Posted at 10:42:00 AM 0 comments (+) Recently, I've been concerned about my weight. And I've never really discussed it other than as a joke, but it really irks me. It irks me to see how chubby my belly is and everything and it's just so hard to cope with it every day. One day I've decided to go on some "diet" I've invented, where I just drink cups of water all day. I still eat, but like in small, once or twice, low fat, some-what healthy foods. I'm just really insecure and no one reads this blog anyway, so I thought I mind as well just leave it here. I really want to lose weight before school. I just want help. I want to be skinny.

Labels: rant, we not so excited

Dream Log #3 Posted at 9:46:00 AM 0 comments (+) Alright, now this dream had to be the definition of strange.

To simplify it, my mom worked at Safeway. It was after hours and she hanging out with this overweight white dude. They were just goofing around and all that until the guy took a slice of some pizza, took a bite of it, then threw it into the vegetables (which I gotta admit is pretty disgusting). Then some lady outside seen what he did and told the customers outside, scaring them off and probably spreading the word. But before like the Safeway organization found out what the fat dude did, Aunt Char Char and Nanny and Domo and Monique was randomly there, got some candy and then left.

The dream made absolutely no sense at all, but I just wanted to write it down before I lost it.

Labels: awkkkkward, dream log

Cruel Summer / Dream Log #2 Posted at 2:34:00 AM 0 comments (+) So, Summer started on June 1st. The first 2 and half or so weeks was wasted at home until finally I was driven over to my Grandparents house by my dad after stuffing my old backpack with few clothes and packing up my laptop. I basically just became comfortable in my cousin's old room. Every day had something to do, and that's what I liked about it. I had breakfast every morning .. and most of the days I was  over there I went walking. I even did some yard work which actually turned out enjoyable. But the last few days, my sister Monique came along to visit. She got into it with Aunt Char Char and when she begged Dad to pick her up, he got into it with his own Mom. We were driven home .. there was definitely tension in the car. When I returned after a week or so, I was bombarded by kisses and hugs from my mom. Yeah, I guess I'll return a l o n e at Nanny's house, to spend some time with Papa and Aunt Char Char and them. I miss having something to do all day, haha.

Last night .. well the night before technically, I had a dream. The description is gonna be kinda vague because I don't know the chronology much. But I basically had this friend ( who I recognized at school but didn't really have any interaction with ) and we were riding around in a car, driving from my friend Ellie (lmfao). And we landed next to these broke down apartments, then this kid I knew from elementary school randomly lived next door. But we basically talked and all that jazz. Then I woke up. But that wasn't all. I have this friend.. I guess I won't state their name. I will admit, I fancy them. But so I haven't seen them in a while and we were like "Hey~". Then, they started .. stroking my dick and biting their lip. And I was like oh. If that happened in real life, it'd just be awkward. I'll just stick with kissing.

Anyway, today.. I didn't do anything. Literally nothing at all. So, I hope I do something tomorrow. This is only the start of the Summer. I'm not through with yet.

Labels: dream log, fight, lazyness, sleep all day, summer, trips, we so kinda excited